I am at a point in my life where I just want to scream! I like to think of myself as a pretty easy going person who mostly likes to please people. But for Gods sake when do I stop! I am frustrated, and I am frustrated with myself most of all! I want to have it work out nice for everyone. But it is not happening!
For right now I am living close to My Mom and closer to My Daughter, hoping that I can help.
My problem started when I though it was some how my responsibility to make others happy! But I think a lot of people are sad because they want to be.
My Mom is a bitch, plain and simple, she always has been and always will be. It is not now, nor has it every been; or ever will be, my responsibility to make her any nicer! Wow that feels good to get that off my chest! Why do we feel that we have to fix someone else? Why do I try to make her nicer? Is it so I can feel better about me, as a daughter? I think that many of the relationships I have had with other women in my life have been colored by the one that never would be right and that is the one with my Mom.
I have a lot of very good female friends, the best friends have always been ones that are older, more together and secure in who they are. They all have talents that are strong and confident. They mentor me into becoming a better person. My very good friend Leanne is just a perfect case in point. She is beautiful and smart and kind and loving and very talented. She is a quilter who is always helpful and kind in teaching me new skills. If I ever have a question or concern she is available to help me at any time. So I have a good grasp of being able to replace that what is lacking in my world because of a mother who is not available. My sister is another good example of a strong woman who is together and talented. She is also a very good friend and when I see what my Mom does to her it really makes me furious.
My daughter is in Washington and we see each other a lot more than we did when I was in California. I watch my Granddaughter about one week a month helping defray some of the day care costs. It is great to see my granddaughter so often. She is 3 and it is so hard to watch her grow up from long distance! It is really wonderful to be part of her life rather than sitting on the side lines.
My daughter is looking for the great answer in life to make it all better. No matter how many times I try and tell her you have to make your own happiness where you are, she doesn't find it. She is sad and depressed and needing to be rescued. So I try, futile as it is I try! I am a co-dependent, I find myself trying to always help. I am searching for the boundaries to keep from helping too much to keep her from recovering from her own situation. I want to be that good Mom that is there for her, (unlike my own mother who was never there for me) how much of my life do I put into helping her get back on her feet? How far to step out on that limb before it breaks and leaves me in the wrong? Do I let her fall and take her precious 3 year old with her? Do I reach deep down inside me and give like there is unlimited giving inside of me...
So I am in the middle of the "squeeze" because I put myself here and don't know how to back away. There is nothing for me to fix in anyone else's life!!! EVER I can never ever ever fix anyone else. And this is my lesson to learn today! I really want to learn it so I can go on to the next lesson.
Joy is right here right now and I need to take care of my joy first and foremost. It reminds me of the flight attendant that says you have to put on your own oxygen mask first, because you can't help anyone else if you don't take care of yourself first!
Wednesday, May 29, 2013
Monday, October 22, 2012
Ungratefulness, Venting it out
I have been thinking about this subject a lot! Maybe a little in the same vein as having a teenager who doesn't know how to say thank you to Aunt Sally for a birthday gift, but more about the new way that seems to be taking over every aspect of our life. Do we have so much that we are no longer thankful for the little gifts and niceties we are given? Have we forgot to say thank you to Grandma for watching the kids. Have we forgot the Thank you when someone does something nice for us just out of the goodness of doing good?
You see it in the attitude of people who get everything they want without having to work for it. When I was young and wanted a pair of roller skates I asked my Dad if I could have a pair for my birthday or Christmas or some such gift giving event. He gave me some advice that I still remember. I was about 10 or 11 years old and he told me "If you work for them and earn the money, they will mean more to you than if somebody else bought them!" I don't think I knew exactly what he meant back then, but I know what he means now. I got a job picking blackberries for 20 cents a crate, it was hard work, getting stickers and stained hands, not to mention the many fights with my brothers and sisters. But I earned enough money to buy my own roller skates.
There were 8 kids in my family and money does not stretch very far across that number, so to help in any way was something special to me. We loved to go skating at the local roller rink, and did it often. I don't know why but it is one of my favorite memories of my early preteen years, just before my parents divorced and life changed. When we would go roller skating and I was able to save 25 cents every time because I had my own skates I felt wonderful and I loved those skates. I would polish them up after every use and put them back in the box to wait for the next time! The skates really did become part of feeling good, being grateful for not only getting something, but saving something, because of my own hard work.
Often times I see people receive a gift and never acknowledge the work that went into the giving of it. Why is it that way? why is the more we have the more we expect? Not just money, but time. If I spent 40 hours of my time making something for you that is from my heart, should I not expect the kindness of gratefulness?
I asked my husband if I am wrong in the expectation of the thanks, or if I am wrong in whom I give my gifts to. Do we have too much stuff? are we overly blessed that we become ungrateful? When I am working on a project he will ask what I am making, and who is it for? Some times he might comment and say "maybe you should make it to sell instead?" Do I have a built in guide to let me know when I am stepping over the line into the territory of "Ungrateful recipient" and not even know it?
Our favorite pastime is to go to second hand stores looking for the great bargains. There are sometimes things that are really awesome at second hand stores, brand new things, never used, never loved, so many in fact it makes me think that a lot of gifts are thrown out and never appreciated.
Thinking back over my own life on some of my ungrateful moments, I have to admit, I never gave the giver the due thanks. I remember getting a handmade vest or scarf from a relative who had a different sense of style than my own. I do remember a reaction that might not have been filled with appreciation. It is long ago to late to change the outcome of that event.
I suppose the whole thing keeps the economy going and the unappreciated items become another man's treasure. If working this formula out in my mind makes some of the disappointments more palatable, I have not wasted my time. So being a generous person should come from the heart. Enjoy the giving without expecting anything in return, even a Thank you.
As well,"To be a better steward of ones time and money", might be a good bit of advice to follow. Just as I learned so much in earning my own skates, maybe I will have to stop taking away someone's ability to earn their own skates!
You see it in the attitude of people who get everything they want without having to work for it. When I was young and wanted a pair of roller skates I asked my Dad if I could have a pair for my birthday or Christmas or some such gift giving event. He gave me some advice that I still remember. I was about 10 or 11 years old and he told me "If you work for them and earn the money, they will mean more to you than if somebody else bought them!" I don't think I knew exactly what he meant back then, but I know what he means now. I got a job picking blackberries for 20 cents a crate, it was hard work, getting stickers and stained hands, not to mention the many fights with my brothers and sisters. But I earned enough money to buy my own roller skates.
There were 8 kids in my family and money does not stretch very far across that number, so to help in any way was something special to me. We loved to go skating at the local roller rink, and did it often. I don't know why but it is one of my favorite memories of my early preteen years, just before my parents divorced and life changed. When we would go roller skating and I was able to save 25 cents every time because I had my own skates I felt wonderful and I loved those skates. I would polish them up after every use and put them back in the box to wait for the next time! The skates really did become part of feeling good, being grateful for not only getting something, but saving something, because of my own hard work.
Often times I see people receive a gift and never acknowledge the work that went into the giving of it. Why is it that way? why is the more we have the more we expect? Not just money, but time. If I spent 40 hours of my time making something for you that is from my heart, should I not expect the kindness of gratefulness?
I asked my husband if I am wrong in the expectation of the thanks, or if I am wrong in whom I give my gifts to. Do we have too much stuff? are we overly blessed that we become ungrateful? When I am working on a project he will ask what I am making, and who is it for? Some times he might comment and say "maybe you should make it to sell instead?" Do I have a built in guide to let me know when I am stepping over the line into the territory of "Ungrateful recipient" and not even know it?
Our favorite pastime is to go to second hand stores looking for the great bargains. There are sometimes things that are really awesome at second hand stores, brand new things, never used, never loved, so many in fact it makes me think that a lot of gifts are thrown out and never appreciated.
Thinking back over my own life on some of my ungrateful moments, I have to admit, I never gave the giver the due thanks. I remember getting a handmade vest or scarf from a relative who had a different sense of style than my own. I do remember a reaction that might not have been filled with appreciation. It is long ago to late to change the outcome of that event.
I suppose the whole thing keeps the economy going and the unappreciated items become another man's treasure. If working this formula out in my mind makes some of the disappointments more palatable, I have not wasted my time. So being a generous person should come from the heart. Enjoy the giving without expecting anything in return, even a Thank you.
As well,"To be a better steward of ones time and money", might be a good bit of advice to follow. Just as I learned so much in earning my own skates, maybe I will have to stop taking away someone's ability to earn their own skates!
Monday, September 24, 2012
The Running Quilter
I feel great, finally I am back on my training schedule and getting ready for the distance, but my mind is still wondering 'Why do I continue to run'? I am not fast, there are people much faster than I, so we know I am not trying to set any world records. I know I do it for myself, as well as to raise money for research for cancer.
To say that I run to help those that can't is really a stretch of the imagination. I even thought it was a stretch when I was working with a team and had all the coaches telling me it constantly. It is hard for me to compare having a choice to run in the morning , To chemo, radiation or painful medical procedures! It is honestly a slap in the face to the person who is going through a life threatening illness to say I am doing it for them. I think it alleviates the guilt, doing something, anything when it feels like there is really nothing to do. And since it can raise money, by getting donations to help with research financing and as in breast cancer, provide testing for those who can't afford it! So in some obscure way it is true. I run because they can't.
But really deep down inside why do I run? I do it because when I run I feel! I feel pain with my body reaching further than it did before, it is a good pain (at least that is the goal, bad pain is the obstacle) I love the time I am out running where I can clear my mind of other things, often times I work out problems, and find simple solutions. Sometimes all I do is just enjoy the senses around me, the smell of the early morning dew, the sight of the mist rising up off the lake, or the young father fishing with his child. There are so many things to look at to feel and to enjoy when it is just you and your thoughts.
I remember the conversation I had with my son when I first started thinking about running long distances, he asked me if I had any idea what was involved, and well I really did not. I have ran a lot in my life for various reasons, to get in shape, to stay in shape, to get somewhere faster! I have enjoyed it over the years, I remember when I was a kid, someone encouraged me to run track and field and I was good at it! I was a quick little sprinter, life happened and it was no longer a priority for me. Fast forward about 40 years give or take a year or two. I found my self pushing 50 out of shape, out of sync with life, just existing not really living. Challenged by my son who told me I could not do it! Ha, whether or not he did it because he knows I am challenge motivated or he seriously thought I could not do it, still remains to be seen. Now that I have 5 marathons to my name he swears it was to motivate me!
I am now 56, and knowing that the years are adding up faster than I can imagine doesn't help. But I am still working on that next run, getting ready to beat my own fastest time. My nephew says I do it because I like to brag and be known as the runner in my circle of friends who have a hard time walking enough to get their grocery shopping done. I suppose there is truth in that statement too, there is a satisfaction knowing that I can still shock some when they find out I run 26.2 miles, and at my age! and yeah sometimes I remind myself, I get a kick out of the fact that I just can!
I am also a seamstress, a quilter, a creator of clothing recycled from discarded and unused items, brought back to life to be used again. As a seamstress I love to sew and create at night when the rest of the world is sleeping; The night owl in me is enjoying the quiet house where sewing comes easy to me, often times staying up until the break of dawn.
Which brings me to the heart of my dilemma; the runner, who loves getting up real early in the morning before the rest of the world starts moving very much has a problem with the quilter taking up all my sleep time! Now if I did not need to sleep there would be no problem, I could sew all night then just as the sun started to crest the hill I could get out and run. But to run a marathon one needs sleep, lots of sleep and if I were to sew all night, run my distances necessary to qualify me for being ready to run a marathon, I would have to sleep for about 8 hours in the middle of the day! Or more likely than not, pass out while I was trying to run on no sleep,
Since I started training again 6 months ago I have tried every combination of sleep - sewing - running, to get the maximum number of hours and also have plenty of time to do the other tasks that need to be done in a day( thankfully I have the most wonderful husband who is amazingly able and willing to do most of the household tasks; cooking, cleaning, laundry etc. it is a easier problem. But there is still a problem, but for now the solution is I sew until 11:30 stop and get ready for bed so hopefully I am asleep by midnight, then up at 6am out the door to run 4 days a week. Three days are small short 5 miles or less runs, one day a week I put in some serious miles right now I am between 16 and 20, each week adding more until I have ran 30 miles (well my goal is 30 but to be honest really the longest pre-marathon miles has been around 20-22 miles. I want to run more miles than the marathon because I think that is how I am going to break my barrier to beating my goal.) After my run take my shower, unwind maybe take a nap, get other "Chores" out of the way and start sewing around 1PM. this schedule is working, well it is mostly working, but I have days where my concentration is so great on my running that I have a hard time changing gears to accomplish my sewing goals, which usually means getting my customers orders out in a timely manner. But for now it is working, with the Marathon the first week in November and the Christmas rush for the sewing pretty much the same time period, we will see how well I do managing my time for both loves.
Well thanks for stopping by, lets see how well I have managed the second week of November!
To say that I run to help those that can't is really a stretch of the imagination. I even thought it was a stretch when I was working with a team and had all the coaches telling me it constantly. It is hard for me to compare having a choice to run in the morning , To chemo, radiation or painful medical procedures! It is honestly a slap in the face to the person who is going through a life threatening illness to say I am doing it for them. I think it alleviates the guilt, doing something, anything when it feels like there is really nothing to do. And since it can raise money, by getting donations to help with research financing and as in breast cancer, provide testing for those who can't afford it! So in some obscure way it is true. I run because they can't.
But really deep down inside why do I run? I do it because when I run I feel! I feel pain with my body reaching further than it did before, it is a good pain (at least that is the goal, bad pain is the obstacle) I love the time I am out running where I can clear my mind of other things, often times I work out problems, and find simple solutions. Sometimes all I do is just enjoy the senses around me, the smell of the early morning dew, the sight of the mist rising up off the lake, or the young father fishing with his child. There are so many things to look at to feel and to enjoy when it is just you and your thoughts.
I remember the conversation I had with my son when I first started thinking about running long distances, he asked me if I had any idea what was involved, and well I really did not. I have ran a lot in my life for various reasons, to get in shape, to stay in shape, to get somewhere faster! I have enjoyed it over the years, I remember when I was a kid, someone encouraged me to run track and field and I was good at it! I was a quick little sprinter, life happened and it was no longer a priority for me. Fast forward about 40 years give or take a year or two. I found my self pushing 50 out of shape, out of sync with life, just existing not really living. Challenged by my son who told me I could not do it! Ha, whether or not he did it because he knows I am challenge motivated or he seriously thought I could not do it, still remains to be seen. Now that I have 5 marathons to my name he swears it was to motivate me!
I am now 56, and knowing that the years are adding up faster than I can imagine doesn't help. But I am still working on that next run, getting ready to beat my own fastest time. My nephew says I do it because I like to brag and be known as the runner in my circle of friends who have a hard time walking enough to get their grocery shopping done. I suppose there is truth in that statement too, there is a satisfaction knowing that I can still shock some when they find out I run 26.2 miles, and at my age! and yeah sometimes I remind myself, I get a kick out of the fact that I just can!
I am also a seamstress, a quilter, a creator of clothing recycled from discarded and unused items, brought back to life to be used again. As a seamstress I love to sew and create at night when the rest of the world is sleeping; The night owl in me is enjoying the quiet house where sewing comes easy to me, often times staying up until the break of dawn.
Which brings me to the heart of my dilemma; the runner, who loves getting up real early in the morning before the rest of the world starts moving very much has a problem with the quilter taking up all my sleep time! Now if I did not need to sleep there would be no problem, I could sew all night then just as the sun started to crest the hill I could get out and run. But to run a marathon one needs sleep, lots of sleep and if I were to sew all night, run my distances necessary to qualify me for being ready to run a marathon, I would have to sleep for about 8 hours in the middle of the day! Or more likely than not, pass out while I was trying to run on no sleep,
Since I started training again 6 months ago I have tried every combination of sleep - sewing - running, to get the maximum number of hours and also have plenty of time to do the other tasks that need to be done in a day( thankfully I have the most wonderful husband who is amazingly able and willing to do most of the household tasks; cooking, cleaning, laundry etc. it is a easier problem. But there is still a problem, but for now the solution is I sew until 11:30 stop and get ready for bed so hopefully I am asleep by midnight, then up at 6am out the door to run 4 days a week. Three days are small short 5 miles or less runs, one day a week I put in some serious miles right now I am between 16 and 20, each week adding more until I have ran 30 miles (well my goal is 30 but to be honest really the longest pre-marathon miles has been around 20-22 miles. I want to run more miles than the marathon because I think that is how I am going to break my barrier to beating my goal.) After my run take my shower, unwind maybe take a nap, get other "Chores" out of the way and start sewing around 1PM. this schedule is working, well it is mostly working, but I have days where my concentration is so great on my running that I have a hard time changing gears to accomplish my sewing goals, which usually means getting my customers orders out in a timely manner. But for now it is working, with the Marathon the first week in November and the Christmas rush for the sewing pretty much the same time period, we will see how well I do managing my time for both loves.
Well thanks for stopping by, lets see how well I have managed the second week of November!
Tuesday, September 11, 2012
What was he thinking!
Normally I am saying that about myself, I do something totally lame and smack my forehead and wonder what the heck I was thinking! Today the question is totally for someone else and their hair-brained action.
I took my sister in law to the doctor today, she has her leg in a cast and can't drive, her daughter had to work and my Mother in law, her back up had surgery last week. So that left me the only other person in the family that has a drivers license. But truly it was a fun day and I love my Sister in law, I can really whine about my husband to her, since he was always the pesky older brother, she gets it!
But back to the lame idiot who almost caused a pile up on the already totally over crowded Southern California freeway. Traffic was going at a reasonable clip, not lagging by any standard but it was not the open road to 90 miles per hour either. Mr. "Air Head" decided that he wanted to get around the traffic, how this thought entered into his brain when it was quite obvious that even if he could pass a few cars he was not going to break any records getting to his destination. It was clearly one of those days that if you calmed down and went with the flow of traffic you would reach your destination. Then an idiot has to go and mess up the natural flow of things.
We were on the 10 heading West, there were four lanes of traffic, I was in the slow lane getting close to my exit going at about 45 miles per hour the constant flow of traffic for the last 25 miles or so.
I was chatting with my Sister in law about men in general how stupid they can be when Mr."Air Head" tries to pass me on the shoulder! I am as serious as I have ever been, this guy is trying to pass on the right Shoulder coming up to an exit! With no intention of getting off, he just wanted to get around, get around about 700 vehicles in front of him!
The worse thing he did was startle me and several others who were in his way! What the heck are you supposed to do when some idiot does something like that! i applied my breaks with about as much pressure that I applied the horn and my terrible vocabulary went into over drive! OK I was in the Army, I can talk potty mouth with the best of them. I am still amazed that the idiot did not cause any major damage to our vehicle or any one else's, he might have raised a few eyebrows and definitely raised my blood pressure. But the thing that gets me the most is he got no where faster, he risked the lives of so many people for that stupid stunt, just to get some place a few seconds sooner.
I am still mad at the jerk, I am still thinking what a terrible thing could have happened. So I am happy to get to my destination in one piece, maybe a little late, maybe a little bit stressed, but that mans karma bill is due!
I took my sister in law to the doctor today, she has her leg in a cast and can't drive, her daughter had to work and my Mother in law, her back up had surgery last week. So that left me the only other person in the family that has a drivers license. But truly it was a fun day and I love my Sister in law, I can really whine about my husband to her, since he was always the pesky older brother, she gets it!
But back to the lame idiot who almost caused a pile up on the already totally over crowded Southern California freeway. Traffic was going at a reasonable clip, not lagging by any standard but it was not the open road to 90 miles per hour either. Mr. "Air Head" decided that he wanted to get around the traffic, how this thought entered into his brain when it was quite obvious that even if he could pass a few cars he was not going to break any records getting to his destination. It was clearly one of those days that if you calmed down and went with the flow of traffic you would reach your destination. Then an idiot has to go and mess up the natural flow of things.
We were on the 10 heading West, there were four lanes of traffic, I was in the slow lane getting close to my exit going at about 45 miles per hour the constant flow of traffic for the last 25 miles or so.
I was chatting with my Sister in law about men in general how stupid they can be when Mr."Air Head" tries to pass me on the shoulder! I am as serious as I have ever been, this guy is trying to pass on the right Shoulder coming up to an exit! With no intention of getting off, he just wanted to get around, get around about 700 vehicles in front of him!
The worse thing he did was startle me and several others who were in his way! What the heck are you supposed to do when some idiot does something like that! i applied my breaks with about as much pressure that I applied the horn and my terrible vocabulary went into over drive! OK I was in the Army, I can talk potty mouth with the best of them. I am still amazed that the idiot did not cause any major damage to our vehicle or any one else's, he might have raised a few eyebrows and definitely raised my blood pressure. But the thing that gets me the most is he got no where faster, he risked the lives of so many people for that stupid stunt, just to get some place a few seconds sooner.
I am still mad at the jerk, I am still thinking what a terrible thing could have happened. So I am happy to get to my destination in one piece, maybe a little late, maybe a little bit stressed, but that mans karma bill is due!
Monday, September 3, 2012
Paper Mache and Migraine's
Migraines, too many too often! Today I woke up with one and because I did not have the medicine to get rid of it, I suffered. I am allowed to have 6 pills a month, if I get 7 migraines the 7th one really sucks~ And when you have the 7th one on the 14th of the month it is going to be a long and insufferable month!
I pretty much whined and cried most of the day and took lots and lots of Ibuprofen. by about 6 pm I was over the headache but the day was shot and there was no way I was going to get anything done! Feeling lethargic and totally lucky that I have this awesome husband that fixed me a wonderful dinner and gave me a great massage.
Chris is so awesome, I am really thankful he is in my life. He told me to go and play with my piggies! I have been making some Paper Mache piggy banks and a few other things that I have designed. I have made a really cute frog, an octopus, a bat, or maybe a butterfly, or dragon??? Actually I am not sure what my winged creature is going to be yet, but it is cute so far. The Dog I am having trouble with, it is supposed to be a weenie dog, but it is not quite there, right now it just looks like a paper towel roll! OK maybe not that bad, but it does not look like a dog yet.
Paper Mache is so therapeutic, it helps me relax and it is a really cool art form.The critters are covered with patches of fabric, so it fits right in with my quilting.
I pretty much whined and cried most of the day and took lots and lots of Ibuprofen. by about 6 pm I was over the headache but the day was shot and there was no way I was going to get anything done! Feeling lethargic and totally lucky that I have this awesome husband that fixed me a wonderful dinner and gave me a great massage.
Chris is so awesome, I am really thankful he is in my life. He told me to go and play with my piggies! I have been making some Paper Mache piggy banks and a few other things that I have designed. I have made a really cute frog, an octopus, a bat, or maybe a butterfly, or dragon??? Actually I am not sure what my winged creature is going to be yet, but it is cute so far. The Dog I am having trouble with, it is supposed to be a weenie dog, but it is not quite there, right now it just looks like a paper towel roll! OK maybe not that bad, but it does not look like a dog yet.
Paper Mache is so therapeutic, it helps me relax and it is a really cool art form.The critters are covered with patches of fabric, so it fits right in with my quilting.
End of The Summer
Our little town is having the time of it's life, with all the weekenders around and many festivities going on, it is a fun atmosphere. I ran the lake today and was totally amazed at the number of runners out getting in miles around the lake. There was this younger woman who lapped me about 4 times! I feel old and slow. I am not sure if she took the short cuts around the lake or not. You can either go around the lake on the road, which is about 3.5 miles or you can go around the path on the lake which is about 2.7 miles if you stay to the path, but with the water so low there are a few more short cuts that take off about .2 miles. I went around the road for the most part, I do go off the road on one corner that is a little dangerous to stick to the road and the difference is very small if any.
After my run I was waiting for Chris, who goes with me but usually collects cans and bottles to recycle and he also picks up trash and throws it in the trash bin, he is always doing his part. When I go around twice I usually meet him back at the truck about the same time, but today it was a little warm and I was fighting my music and a nagging headache so I just decided to wait and people watch. There were a lot of people to watch today.
It is so amazing how many people hang out at the lake and either fish or just enjoy the end of the summer. The nights are already starting to get cool and the days are not quite as hot. This is the final summer fling, tomorrow the lake will entertain it's last days of swimmers, then they will put away the boats and get ready for the winter. This summer went so fast, it was just a few days ago that it was memorial day.
Remember when you were a kid and the summer would last forever? When we lived on the beach for a few years. IN my mind it seems like it was a really long time but in reality it was only a few years, but those years on the beach were some of the best years. Especially in the summer time. I remember Kool Aid sticky and sweet, and hot dogs and potato salad and watermelon. Summer food was the best when we were kids.
My favorite part about Labor day was getting ready to go back to school. I loved summer time but I loved going back to school too. We always had at least one new outfit to wear, and in our case a few of my older sisters hand me downs. My problem was I was taller than my two older sisters and they wore their skirts short! On me it was shorter than short, so I learned to sew. I would sew what I could by hand, my grandmother had a machine and showed me a little, but my mom did not sew at all.
When we went to school we had to change our clothes as soon as we got home. There was a dress code, girls wore dressed, boys wore pants, not jeans and shirts with collars and pockets, no tee shirts!
Things were different for sure. I was watching the kids get on the school bus the other day and they were wearing shorts! really it was hard to tell that they were on their way to school except for the book bags and lunch boxes. I am not saying that our way was better it was just more familiar to me and so I have a comfort with the way it was when I was a kid. Some things never change and some things do, we just get used to wat is comfortable to us.
I was listening to some ladies talking about the youth of today and the Tattoos! the ladies were older than I am I am guessing mid to late 60's and in their mind tattoos are from the devil! I had to laugh, I am not crazy about some of the tattoos I see, but I understand that it is an expression of who they are. When we were young we got our ears pierced and wore tye dyed tee shirts and long skirts with lots of beads. There was always rebellion and there will always be rebellion and self expression. I just don't like to see it get in the way of someones future. But if you like the look then pay the consequences.... I know I was thinking about the end of summer and I suppose I got off subject, but in a way not, because I think I am at that age where it is the end of summer in my life, I am getting into the Autumn season, but honestly it has always been my favorite. I suppose if we make it through our "Halloween season" then we get to what we are thankful for and finally the Christmas spirit of things.
I have 9 weeks until my last/next marathon and I wonder if I am doing everything I can to get ready. Maybe that will be my Halloween Season!
Trick Or Treat~
After my run I was waiting for Chris, who goes with me but usually collects cans and bottles to recycle and he also picks up trash and throws it in the trash bin, he is always doing his part. When I go around twice I usually meet him back at the truck about the same time, but today it was a little warm and I was fighting my music and a nagging headache so I just decided to wait and people watch. There were a lot of people to watch today.
It is so amazing how many people hang out at the lake and either fish or just enjoy the end of the summer. The nights are already starting to get cool and the days are not quite as hot. This is the final summer fling, tomorrow the lake will entertain it's last days of swimmers, then they will put away the boats and get ready for the winter. This summer went so fast, it was just a few days ago that it was memorial day.
Remember when you were a kid and the summer would last forever? When we lived on the beach for a few years. IN my mind it seems like it was a really long time but in reality it was only a few years, but those years on the beach were some of the best years. Especially in the summer time. I remember Kool Aid sticky and sweet, and hot dogs and potato salad and watermelon. Summer food was the best when we were kids.
My favorite part about Labor day was getting ready to go back to school. I loved summer time but I loved going back to school too. We always had at least one new outfit to wear, and in our case a few of my older sisters hand me downs. My problem was I was taller than my two older sisters and they wore their skirts short! On me it was shorter than short, so I learned to sew. I would sew what I could by hand, my grandmother had a machine and showed me a little, but my mom did not sew at all.
When we went to school we had to change our clothes as soon as we got home. There was a dress code, girls wore dressed, boys wore pants, not jeans and shirts with collars and pockets, no tee shirts!
Things were different for sure. I was watching the kids get on the school bus the other day and they were wearing shorts! really it was hard to tell that they were on their way to school except for the book bags and lunch boxes. I am not saying that our way was better it was just more familiar to me and so I have a comfort with the way it was when I was a kid. Some things never change and some things do, we just get used to wat is comfortable to us.
I was listening to some ladies talking about the youth of today and the Tattoos! the ladies were older than I am I am guessing mid to late 60's and in their mind tattoos are from the devil! I had to laugh, I am not crazy about some of the tattoos I see, but I understand that it is an expression of who they are. When we were young we got our ears pierced and wore tye dyed tee shirts and long skirts with lots of beads. There was always rebellion and there will always be rebellion and self expression. I just don't like to see it get in the way of someones future. But if you like the look then pay the consequences.... I know I was thinking about the end of summer and I suppose I got off subject, but in a way not, because I think I am at that age where it is the end of summer in my life, I am getting into the Autumn season, but honestly it has always been my favorite. I suppose if we make it through our "Halloween season" then we get to what we are thankful for and finally the Christmas spirit of things.
I have 9 weeks until my last/next marathon and I wonder if I am doing everything I can to get ready. Maybe that will be my Halloween Season!
Trick Or Treat~
Sunday, August 26, 2012
Little Girls Playing
Today while I was sewing I had the window open and I could hear the little girls across the street playing. I was so glad to hear them out side and not connected to some kind of electronic device.
They were playing hide and go seek and tag and some jump rope games. The oldest one I think is around 9 to 11 and the littlest one was about 4, the one in the middle I am thinking around 7. They actually reminded me of our family when we were young. I am from a big family, there were 8 of us kids and throw in the neighbor kids and there was always someone to play with.
The oldest was the one in charge, she was the one who said it was time to change games and she was never "it" well unless she wanted to be! The two older ones would hide and the little one was so excited about going to find them you could just tell by her voice, she never complained or got mad or wanted to take the jump rope and go home! She had spunk! The middle one did what ever the older girl wanted to do, but she was old enough to question weather it was a good idea, she always had a question no matter what the game, and foremost in her mind was"Is it fair" I think the littlest one was her sister and the oldest was a neighbor, but not real sure, they moved into a house that has gone through quite a few people just in the 14 months we have lived here, but this is the first time I have actually seen children playing in the yard and no loud music at night. That house has been known to have a few shady characters in it.
I was pretty impressed with the dynamics of the girls and how well they played together. I did on one occasion hear a blood curdling scream, I had quit paying attention to them and was working on my sewing so I am not sure what happened, but I know the little one finally had enough and got mad because the two older girls would not let her climb the tree, they did not want her to get hurt, she wanted up that tree and let everyone with in ear shot know. it brought Mom out side and the girls in the tree had to get down and all had to go inside and play.
I wonder how many times when we were young did we get into screaming matches to bring in a parent to play referee. Playing is so important to developing good social skills, you can almost see the kind of adult some of the kids are going to make by how they play with others.
With our society changing so fast because of the ability to connect to the rest of the world, I can't help but wonder if in the long run it is going to be good or bad for our society.
My Daughter and granddaughter Skype with me about 2 times a month so I get to know her a little better than we would know each other with out Skype. She is almost 3 and I think it would be a lot harder to live so far away with out Skype. So there are some good things about technology, but I wonder about some of the other changes that are not so good.
We went to dinner a few months back with some nieces, nephews, cousins, and well relations of all ages, there were about 30 people and I was amazed how many, including the adults, that had their electronic device on and were spending more time focused on it that the people at the table, even though we had come from far and wide to get together, we were not as together as you would think.
Accidents are happening more and more often due to responding to that little electronic device rather than what is going on in traffic. How many marriages are falling apart because one or both partners feel they can get more of their needs met by being "online".
So as I recall the games the girls were playing I can't help but think is this something that is going to continue to decline in our age of cell phones, ipads, texting and any number of games to be played with someone across the country, while we never even get to know who lives next door.
I think a nice walk is in order.
They were playing hide and go seek and tag and some jump rope games. The oldest one I think is around 9 to 11 and the littlest one was about 4, the one in the middle I am thinking around 7. They actually reminded me of our family when we were young. I am from a big family, there were 8 of us kids and throw in the neighbor kids and there was always someone to play with.
The oldest was the one in charge, she was the one who said it was time to change games and she was never "it" well unless she wanted to be! The two older ones would hide and the little one was so excited about going to find them you could just tell by her voice, she never complained or got mad or wanted to take the jump rope and go home! She had spunk! The middle one did what ever the older girl wanted to do, but she was old enough to question weather it was a good idea, she always had a question no matter what the game, and foremost in her mind was"Is it fair" I think the littlest one was her sister and the oldest was a neighbor, but not real sure, they moved into a house that has gone through quite a few people just in the 14 months we have lived here, but this is the first time I have actually seen children playing in the yard and no loud music at night. That house has been known to have a few shady characters in it.
I was pretty impressed with the dynamics of the girls and how well they played together. I did on one occasion hear a blood curdling scream, I had quit paying attention to them and was working on my sewing so I am not sure what happened, but I know the little one finally had enough and got mad because the two older girls would not let her climb the tree, they did not want her to get hurt, she wanted up that tree and let everyone with in ear shot know. it brought Mom out side and the girls in the tree had to get down and all had to go inside and play.
I wonder how many times when we were young did we get into screaming matches to bring in a parent to play referee. Playing is so important to developing good social skills, you can almost see the kind of adult some of the kids are going to make by how they play with others.
With our society changing so fast because of the ability to connect to the rest of the world, I can't help but wonder if in the long run it is going to be good or bad for our society.
My Daughter and granddaughter Skype with me about 2 times a month so I get to know her a little better than we would know each other with out Skype. She is almost 3 and I think it would be a lot harder to live so far away with out Skype. So there are some good things about technology, but I wonder about some of the other changes that are not so good.
We went to dinner a few months back with some nieces, nephews, cousins, and well relations of all ages, there were about 30 people and I was amazed how many, including the adults, that had their electronic device on and were spending more time focused on it that the people at the table, even though we had come from far and wide to get together, we were not as together as you would think.
Accidents are happening more and more often due to responding to that little electronic device rather than what is going on in traffic. How many marriages are falling apart because one or both partners feel they can get more of their needs met by being "online".
So as I recall the games the girls were playing I can't help but think is this something that is going to continue to decline in our age of cell phones, ipads, texting and any number of games to be played with someone across the country, while we never even get to know who lives next door.
I think a nice walk is in order.
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